Nigerian musician and entrepreneur Banky W has shared a cautionary story about marriage, emphasizing the importance of emotional presence and intentional partnership.
Speaking on a recent episode of the Mentality Podcast, Banky W recounted the experience of a man he knows who sponsored his wife’s move to the United States for nursing school.
According to him, the man worked tirelessly in Nigeria for more than a decade, funding his wife’s education, lifestyle, and that of their children, only for her to later file for divorce.
“He spent about ten to fifteen years sending money overseas,” Banky W explained. “At the end of it, she said, ‘We don’t really have a marriage anymore because we grew apart.’”
Using the story as a lesson, Banky W stressed that marriage requires more than financial support, it demands commitment, communication, and intentional closeness.
He shared how he and his wife, Adesua Etomi, set clear “rules of engagement” from the start of their marriage. One of those rules: if they are in the same city, they must sleep in the same place, even if it means staying together at a hotel.
“Couples need to decide these things ahead of time,” he said. “In that first year, when you’re figuring each other out, misunderstandings will happen. But no matter the argument, go and see family, then come back home.”
Banky W concluded by urging couples to establish boundaries and communication habits early in their relationship to prevent emotional distance over time.
